Tippy Kowtow

Today I have learned how to spell "kowtow." I was texting my friend about a doofus we both know and the phrase I wanted to use was, "He usually kowtows to people he knows are better than him at what they do." 

As I tapped away at the letters on my iPhone, blasting full steam ahead into this text, I had to stop and realize that I didn't know how to spell kowtow. Had I ever actually spelled kowtow? Come to think of it, had I ever actually used kowtow in a sentence with enough confidence in my vocabulary to speak it loud enough for all to hear? 

I stopped and looked at what I'd written, "He usually cow tows to people..." Cow tows? An image of a cow towing a busted up Ford came to mind. That can't be right... Cowtow, maybe? How does that make it any better, Chanel? Tow is tow no matter how close I put it to the cow. 

This lead to an immediate sidebar in my head about how the English language really is whacked out. How in the hell are you supposed to spell kowtow with a cow and a tow? It's the wrong O sound in tow. It doesn't make any sense!

So I did what I always do in these situations. I turned to the trusty Google, waiting for me right where I'd left it--on my bookmarks bar, sandwiched between Wiki and dictionary.com.

I type in "cowtow" and wham! Before I even hit search, the interwebs is asking me, "Hey, you American fool, did you mean 'kowtow?'" Yes! Yes, Google, I did mean kowtow!

Apparently Kowtow derives from kòu tóu, and it's Mandarin Chinese. No wonder I didn't know how to spell it. Why is this verb even in my brain vault? 

I don't know, but if you're wondering what the hell kowtow even means, according to the wonderful Wiki: 

"Kowtow, which is borrowed from kòu tóu in Mandarin Chinese, is the act of deep respect shown by prostration, that is, kneeling and bowing so low as to have one's head touching the ground."

At least I used it correctly.